1. Love yourself. - Now on this everyone tells me they love me and that they wish I would see what they see... You know what I see a big fat girl standing in a mirror looking unhappy with the reflection that she sees back. I see a single girl who thinks no one will love her because the majority of guys that have been in her life, has uttered those 9 heartbreaking words - YOU WOULD BE REALLY PRETTY IF YOU LOST WEIGHT.... How is any one meant to feel pretty and lovable when you hear the above or you have such a pretty face if only you lost a couple of kgs... Well you know what every time I heard that I headed straight for the packet of chips, or chocolate of KFC or anything food wise that I thought would cheer me up... I know right.. I don't get it either, why would you go and eat something that's 5 times your daily calorie intake after someone called you fat. You're just proving to them that you are, but it didn't stop me.
2. See Rule 1.
I cleaned my study today (off topic but only for a second) I was going through the drawers and came across about 5 of my yearly diaries, I might have a slight 'hoarder obsession'. ha ha However I thought it would be a kick to go through them and see how my life has changed, well I pretty much broke down on the floor, at the beginning of every year I put - This is your year Ange, you will lose weight and get healthy.. Well I'm pretty sure I am about 15kg heavier then when I wrote that.. I have done Jenny, Weight Watchers, Tony Ferg yes I lost weight but I put it all back on. You know why because I wasn't committed I wanted the lollies and chocolate or the chips and dip so I ate it and then complained and cried why I'm not losing weight.
I work hard I exercise, but never did I realise that it was the food or sometimes the lack of it that was/is holding me back. I have googled and people tell me all the time, ways to lose weight and that I am obviously doing something wrong. One trainer worked out that I was only eating 800 calories a day - I thought not eating would help me lose weight, Im pretty sure I did that for about 10 years. I didnt eat breakfast and ate when I was hungry, which as you can imagine for someone who didnt eat much, wasnt that often.
I exercise a lot I have spent thousands, maybe even tens of thousands of dollars on Personal trainers, Gym Memberships, Nutritionists, help yourself books, hypnotherapy sessions, you name it I have probably done it...
BUT GUESS WHAT I HAVE NEVER DONE - Believed I could do it.. Until now.!! That lightbulb moment that goes off in your head, that you think why have I waited 34 years to do this. Ok Im 34 so why have I waited 20 years to do this.. Have I stopped myself from dating because I was to embarrassed of my size, I am beautiful, I have a killer personality, Im the funniest person you will ever meet, I will look after you and take care of you.. Im the friend you want to have, so why dont I treat myself like I do everyone else??? I would NEVER let any one get away with talking to my friends as I do myself... what is wrong with this picture???
Today I joined Michelle Bridges 12WBT and you know what Im going to kill it. I am that motivated I WANT this more than anything.. Im going to be turning heads at this years Christmas party (yes its only 6 weeks away) but I can lose 6 kg in that time and gain 6kg of confidence... I will strut yes STRUT through the doors of the event.
My achievements in my life so far: -
Last weekend I did my first Triathlon, it was a small one 200m swim, 6km ride and 3km run - I did it in 64 mins..
I have done countless Fun Runs both 5km and 10km (not running the whole way - but yes that is a GOAL of mine).....
Non exercise achievements - I went on a 7 week holiday to the USA by myself, met some truly amazing people and ticked another thing of my bucket list - Travel alone to another country.
Yes that is just a couple of things - OK MY TWO BUCKET LIST tick offs that I wanted to share with you all..
I have also been through medical hell over the past two years, which I will share with you another time.. I need time to heal with that before I tell you all....
I feel really good about this new chapter of my life and I look forward to closing the last 14 years of ups and downs (or downers) as I call them.. I am in a MUCH better place now and I am finding my Happy, I am not looking for love, I am learning to love me first.. then see what happens...
I will update my ups and downs (there hopefully wont be many downs) on my journey to being even more awesome than I already am.
Because there is only one thing you need to know.
I AM AWESOME ANGE!!!!
xoxo
No comments:
Post a Comment